EXCERPTS FROM THE DIARIES OF MALADIN, PART SIX

[Portions of this document may have been deleted or changed to protect the innocent...that's me]

The Scene:

After a long night of pouring over plans for the battle, Maladin is going through his daily physical workout. After exercising and stretching he is going over forms in his tent, while he contemplates his life.

Aaron. Where are you, and what are you really up to? Are you fixing the scars of your madness? The scars you left on New York? I have seen thousands die in battle, but they were soldiers. I have seen the innocent die as well. But, I have never seen one of my allies turn such a cold and alien eye towards innocent lives before. Not on this scale.

Where are you, Aaron? Did the situation call for such a drastic solution? Are you off now, cooking up your genocidal weapon for the Waveriders?

SNIP

Someone needs to watch you, Aaron. I will do my part to keep you on this side of sanity. But I must not allow myself to rationalize the death of innocents. I must not allow myself that luxury. Or I will become a monster.

That ancient code still haunts me. It mocks me, and calls to me from the hallways of the unconscious. Drawing me to its ways. But I too have a dark side. If I am to live up to this code, I will need to harness the strength of my dark side as well. To deny my darkness will lead to suffering. To identify too greatly with it will lead down the path Aaron has stumbled on. Power, Hubris. Aaron could not see his dark side until it had consumed him in the moment. And now he suffers for his actions. But will he still be blind after this?

Dalen. Dalen. Dalen. Oh, you poor simple tavern girl. I can't believe you told that Galen when our attack was. AAHHH. How many mistakes can one girl make? How many times will I trust her blindly? Who is more foolish, the fool or the one who follows her? You keep your little secrets. I know you have them. Pieces of information. Information you have NO IDEA what to do with. But you keep it to yourself all the same. Dammit. Haven't I earned your trust yet?! By God, what does it take, woman!

BIG SNIP

And now I am helping you search for a solution to the Waveriders, a peaceful solution that you can live with. Do you even realize all that I do? NO. Did I sell the king on it? Yes. Did I bargain with Galen for it? Yes. And then there are the intangibles, like explaining to Lentaro how to keep our guinea pig waverider from running away after/if we find a workable vaccine.

I have trusted you. Time and again. With my most intimate personal info, with the secrets of Vitae. And I did not tell Random everything I know about you. I did not betray your trust. Have I betrayed Random's by keeping this info from him? Is it worth it? Huh, Dalen? Where should I draw the line with you? Are you going to prove it was all worth my effort? Prove to me that you deserve my trust and help?

Len. My old comrade. You seem almost like a completely new person from the carefree Len I use to know. There is something there. I feel like there is something between us, unresolved. What are you holding against me? Anything? Is it just my imagination? Did I slight you somehow? If so, forgive me. Forgive my crudeness, I am rough around the edges, ya know. Or is it that we kept such big secrets from each other before, that we are uncertain of who the other really is? We must work through it, somehow.

Rhyss. Oh my. How captivating and intriguing she is. Watch out, Maladin. I smell trouble with this one. Dangerous. I like dangerous too much. Resist your impulses, remain objective. She is an Amberite, remember, it would be too much like playing with a black widow. It could be fun to play, but one false move andouch, off with your head. I suppose that is true for all the amberite women.

Damn. Why did you start thinking about women? It is too lonely a life as a soldier as it is.

SNIP AGAIN

Oh well, enough 'woe is me', I better get my men in place or these Amberites won't have a home before long.

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