Dalen's Journal, Part Six

Hells, what an understatement.

The Jewel is safe back in Random's keeping. I still have no idea why he thought it would be safe with Florimel. Yes, no one would ever think to look there ... but Florimel of all people?!? She doesn't seem to have the requisite core of responsibility or common sense that would go with being the keeper of the Jewel. Perhaps I did not see her in the best of circumstances ... but anyone who could think that getting her nails done is more important than finding the whereabouts of the Jewel of Judgement doesn't seem a likely steward, in my humble opinion.

I don't know if Florimel's shadow will ever be the same. Aaron said he damaged it fairly thoroughly. I'm glad the child and I weren't around to see the devastation. Aaron will be gone for a while, trying to undo what was done. That seems to be the morality tale of our times ... undoing that which has been destroyed, albeit it was through good intentions. Am I trying to play Aaron in my desire to give the Oleai the ability to move through shadow? Replacing something which was theirs ... similar, but not truly the same. Who will grieve in New York for what was lost? How many hundreds of thousands were consigned to oblivion? We of Amber seem to have a happy knack of wiping out entire locales.

Of course, so do those who have named us as the enemy. Witness the relentless destruction of Helmwind.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Moonriders' need to change things, or our own? Has Amber always found its wholeness in the wreck of others?

As I nibble on the exquisite sandwiches in front of me, I realize how ingrained being an Amberite is in me. True, it's all I know how to be -- either as a commoner or as a Duchess (or whatever my official rank would be now). I had the boy ... ergo I had the Jewel. I could have trumped Galen and handed both over to the Oleai -- that would have shaken up the establishment, in more ways than one -- but I never even thought of it. It never occurred to me that the Jewel should be anywhere but in Random's keeping -- I had to get it back to Amber. What would Sh'shari have done with it, I wonder? Continued on her rampage to wipe us all out? As fulfilling as that may seem to her, it's not the answer.

I wonder if wiping out all of Amber seems as perfect a plan to her now as it did when she started. The visions I've had, especially the most recent one, seems to suggest some regret ... but whether at wiping us out or over something else, it's impossible to say. Conjecture is all I have at this point and I've been known to be beyond wrong on my hunches.

There are some points on which I still have confusion. Heh, yes Dalen, just a few, huh? By all means, list them out again ... if one doesn't ask, one doesn't get. Let's start at the beginning.

Why was Fumaris killed? Why kill him using a telltale Tellurian poison? Sort of a "resistance is futile" gesture for those who would rather keep Telluria out of the picture? If so, it would seem to indicate an ass-backwards approach to diplomacy. To frame Telluria, or the Tellurian Ambassador -- showing their inherent unworthiness to be in the Silver Circle, while at the same time relieving Amber of a dead bore? (Horrid pun, Dalen. Shame).

It seems likely that whomever killed Fumaris was the one who made him into a life-sucking zombie. That would be ... one of the henchmen for the creator of the Bright Pattern? Osric himself, mayhap? What was the Zombie's mission? It seems like a banquet hall full of guests would be a bad place to try to abduct someone. Still ... it makes quite a statement. Rattles the cages, almost as if we're being taunted. Does Osric like to play with his victims? Cat and mouse?

Where does Lore fit into all this? Is he our proverbial red herring? Someone is mucking about with Trumps, and he certainly has the ability. Did Sh'shari (or whomever I get those visions from) ever get to the point where she laid the proposition out to Lore? What would he gain by helping to destroy Amber? I don't think he's stupid enough to honestly think that he'd get to be ruler over a new order ... or that he hates Amber enough to betray it. Maybe I'm naove on that score. What would make someone like Lore turn against Amber?

Why frame House Cho? Who benefits from having Neechan Cho out of the way?

Who was the man who posed as Sh'tara's ghost?

**BIZARRE IDEA** What would happen if the Jewel of Judgement was taken into the Vitae. Would its nature of "reality" imbue that dimension with enough of itself to allow the people to move through shadow? Osmosis of Reality. Slight seepage of that which "is". Would it kill off all the Oleai that remain? Would it do anything at all besides make the person bearing it an absolute target for instant death at the hands of whomever else wants the Jewel?

Speaking of which, Who was that guy?? The one who was in Shadow Earth, chasing down the child at the same time I was. The one who almost got to him. The one who would probably killed us both if we hadn't managed to get to Amber more quickly than he could shoot off sorcery. He's down in the dungeon now. Maybe Gerard and Fiona will let me watch the "interview". Who does he work for? Osric? Sh'shari? Someone in Telluria? Insidious thought -- does he work for someone who is inside Amber?

How did "they" know I had the child? Did the man in Shadow Earth recognize who I was when I shifted back to my Amber form? Did he then somehow communicate the information to someone who had my Trump, who then forced contact and tried to get the boy? Did he even have time to do something like that? Or do I indeed have some sort of psychic "link" so my movements are monitored? Why me? Is it just because I'm in the middle of things, and am a psychic weakling? I guess I'll have to be safe rather than sorry. I'll have to see if Maladin can flood me with Vitae so as to remove the link, if there is one. Aaron could do it, and so could Bleys, but while I know they wouldn't take advantage of the situation and fry my mind, there are a few things I'd rather they didn't know about me ... and it would be right there, laid out for them, if they did that. Maladin already knows much of the story ... and for some reason (because you're a sucker?) I thought he seemed sincere in his offer of assistance if it was needed. Lentaro is also an option, but well ... Len seems to have some agenda items which I don't know if I'd be comfortable with -- and I don't think I really want to be imbued with Bright Pattern.

The last option is to walk the Pattern. If Maladin isn't available then it will have to be attempted.

Ahhhh, a thought. I don't know how "links" would be established, but I would bet that touch or Trump contact would be needed. While it's possible it happened while I was the "guest" of Sh'shari's people, it's more likely it was set when Sh'tora's ghost touched me -- since it wasn't a ghost at all. If so, find the man, and you'll find those who have been watching. I wonder if he's represented in any of the older Trump decks. I'll have to ask Bleys, Random, or maybe Vialle if I may peruse their decks.

I still want to contact Galen. There must be a way to allow both those of Amber and Chaos to exist with the Oleai, while giving back to the Oleai some of that which was lost to them.

Hope springs eternal, Dalen. Hope springs eternal.