Aaron's Journal, Part Four

I found it!

Yes, I know I shouldn't gloat so much, but it feels so darned good to be right! Even thought I have to remember I nearly killed myself over it, and Maladin is probably going to hold it over my head for a while that he did. Yeah, well, I had saved him earlier that day, so I figure we're more than even now.

First of all, Dalen was captured, supposedly by the people that are now trying to wipe us out of existence, because we did something similar to them. I can't say I did much. I entered into the 'wave' they were in and then I was promptly ejected out. Someone could have told me it was moving

And now Dalen wants to go after peace with them! Crazy woman. She's captured by them, nearly killed by them for who knows what kind of strange magical spell, and now she wants to make everything fine between us?! We got into a discussion about it - she caught me again on one of those subjects that I don't have an answer that people are wanting to hear. She talked about inoculating them so that they could travel from our world to theirs as they please. I thought the idea was impossible - and what purpose would it serve? "Oh, we're so sorry about annihilating your cosmos when we created ours, but we're willing to share what we got."

Not.

Dalen must think that I must be some selfish bastard by now, and I wouldn't blame her - the two subjects she's ever brought up with me were my older brother Lore and now trying to save the Enemy. If she just once brought up an idea that wasn't completely insane I might just agree with her. Well, only time will tell - if we don't get destroyed first.

Personal Note: And Dalen has this annoying talent of raising her voice to me. That's twice now that she has believed that amplifying that squawk sound she makes will create more of a point. I have to admit I raised my voice back at her, but if she does it again I'll show her what raising a voice is really like. I learned some things from those Choir lessons Mother had me take during grade school. I shall not be yelled at.

Her theory on trying to inoculate that species brings up an interesting idea. If we can protect them from out world and the effects it has, there must be a way to change those waves to disrupt them as well. Poison the waters, so to speak. It will take further studying, and possibly a prisoner. The only problem I can see is that we need to make sure that everything else won't be affected in the process.

We have to find a way to stop them.

And then there was my discovery. I may be recovering now from Pattern drain, but damn, I found it! Fiona was ticked. And I have a good feeling that she's not admiring my accomplishments, rather, that I nearly killed myself. Again.

There is another Pattern. I was able to find it, and not get back from where I was at, but I found it. I think my joy of discovering it overrides my incredible sense of fear I had going to a place that looked very different and twisted from the Amber I know. Now that I have found it, it just makes me want to study more and go back to it. It didn't seem to be part of the rest of Shadow; maybe it's in its own microcosm or something - possibly a mirror world of sorts. Who knows, all it really brings to light is that it requires more study. I want to know what it beyond that Pattern door - I want to know who else knows about this thing and how they have the ability to use it. I want to know

How the hell am I going to survive if I keep doing stupid things like this?

Yet again, Aaron, you have come so very close to destroying yourself in the name of Pattern Science and have gained such little information because of it.

But Fiona said "You Win." She might as well have said I was right. It's right before I head to sleep that I believe the novelty of being right wears thin and the dread of nearly dying forms a cloud above my head.

I was surprised Fiona came to my rescue - it seems she actually gives a damn about the things I do, and may_

I've been given a note by the steward to meet with someone about some information about House Cho. The people who "supposedly" claimed the vendetta against Amber - and I was looking forward to sleep. I just know something is going to go wrong. Unicorn protect me

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