Next Tuesday marks the last day of my Passion Search workshop. By that time, I’m supposed to have my final homework completed. This consists of two things: One is something visual that’s supposed to remind me of what is important to me. The other is at least one “vision statement.” For the latter, I can pick from an assortment of aspects about my life to make the vision statement about. It could be a statement about my path in life, it could be about work, it could be something else entirely.

In a rare moment of studiousness, and following the instructions I’ve been given, I’ve gone back through all the notes. I also listened to the one workshop session I had remembered to record. (So I got to spend 45 minutes “enjoying” the sound of myself talking. Ugh.) I’ve picked out keywords, written them on note cards. Then I wrote on the back of each of the cards what those words mean to me. And now I’ve been staring at these cards infrequently, trying to find some sort of meaning in it.

This has mostly resulted in a wave of panic hitting me. In my mind I’m flinching back and flailing my hands in front of my face in a vain attempt to protect myself. I haven’t literally done that. It’s just the best description I have for my mood.

All I’ve been able to figure out is that it involves “stories” some how. That’s what I’ve managed to pull together after almost two months.

Guh.